On Friday, Chris got a call giving him the opportunity to travel to the Pacific for a diving job for a few weeks.
On Monday, he was told that he'd be leaving on Wednesday and that he would probably be gone for a few months.
I dropped him off at the airport last night and it's just starting to sink in that we're here at this ugly "deployment" place again. The worst part of it all is the unexpected nature of it. We knew that with this job, he would have these unexpected opportunities arise, but didn't expect a trip so long and sudden for another few years.
We have two deployments and many tough separations (my semester abroad in Spain, his month-long hiking expedition in Alaska, my 6 months living in Mexico) under our belt, but there's something completely different about this one. Two days notice, (not enough time to even get the car maintenanced) the daunting task of parenting alone, and no homecoming date to focus on makes me feel a bit helpless this morning.
I have shed many many (many) tears this week, and the shirt that Chris was wearing as he took off on that airplane last night was soaked with most of them (and maybe a little snot... he's a good guy). But really horrible days like these make the blessings (even the tiniest ones) shine through all the more.
This morning I am thankful for girlfriends who text and call in the middle of the night to check up on me, for sweet Silas smiles and how easy he just went down for his morning nap, and the flowers that Chris bought me before he left, which are sitting right in front of me as I type.
And I'm thankful for the sustaining power of the Word. I received many verses from sweet IG and twitter friends over the past few days and last night before bed, I poured over those verses and reminded myself that though it really feels like it at moments, I am not in this alone. There is One who has every moment of my day in His hands.
So, I may be AWOL for a few days. OR you may see me here more than often. Not sure how it will go, but just want to focus on getting adjusted to all of this.
Plus, I've gotta spend some time buying up all the chocolate in town.