Wednesday, May 4, 2011

I am flawed ... and loved by God.

I've received some not-very-nice comments on my posts lately. Comments made by individuals hiding behind the cover of an Anonymous name. They are made in the hopes of hurting me, I'm supposing.

On Monday, one of the pictures in my post was of me slurping a de lightfully yummy berry smoothie. And my hair.looks.awful. Really, quite grungy.

A lovely anonymous commenter wrote " Do you not wash your hair?"

Ha! I have to laugh at this one. It sure looks like I don't. But I promise, I do. Usually. Sometimes.

I had some comments last week that were not quite so easy to brush off, and I was in tears for most of the day after reading them. As often happens when people attack us, I began to question who I am as a person and as a blogger. This strange barrage of hurtful comments all of the sudden has got me thinking. Thinking about where my identity is, and where I am finding my worth.

Let me tell you, I have my flaws.

One, as was so poignantly pointed out -- sometimes my hair looks awful. 

Our bedroom most always looks like the photo on the left. Like, I am stepping over piles of laundry to get to my bed some days. The photo on the right-- rare occurrence.

(Old photos-- our bedroom looks ways different now, but more on that later.)



Often, I'm so completely disorganized that I send a giveaway painting to the same person, twice. (Yes, that happened this week. I'm not sure where I left my brain.)

My dad's Italian genes give me nice olive skin, but that also means that I'm quite hairy fuzzy. As in, before I leave to see Chris, I have an appointment to get my face waxed.

I often am so busy that despite my best efforts, I don't get around to responding to your comments. I feel bad about that, but I hope you understand that I appreciate each of you, anyway.

All too often, I find myself having to clean mold out of the fridge. One day I'll keep on top of my leftovers. Eh, maybe.

I'm lazy. I'm selfish. At dinner parties, I would often rather sit on the couch with a glass of wine than help clean up the dishes.

I'm a real person, with real flaws, sins, and quirks.

But.

 I am, first and foremost, a child of the risen God. My identity does not come from how my hair looks. It doesn't stem from what my blog readers have to say about me (good or bad!), how my blog design looks or what I do and say throughout the day.



Romans 8: 38 says, " For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God, that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

So if all of those things can't keep our God from loving us, than I'm pretty sure that moldy leftovers, lost to-do lists and bad hair days can't either. Because God knows things about our hearts that we would never and could never share on our blogs. He knows every selfish thought that goes through our minds and in spite of all that, He loves every greasy hair on our heads.

And that, my friends, is what I am resting in today. And tomorrow, I'll have to pick up my Bible to remind myself of this again, because I'm also... forgetful.


*I don't write this for you guys to feel bad for me getting these comments. Just want to share some encouragement that I've been feeling today. So I hope you are encouraged!*




70 comments:

  1. That is so sad that people are so mean and hide behind Anonymous to do it.

    You are being real and YOU by posting not-so-perfect photos of yourself. I am **so** behind on my blog reading that I haven't read the past few posts of yours so I haven't seen the pictures with your "grungy" hair or whatever it is that they were saying.

    We all have times where we have to shift our priorities and lose our grip on certain things.

    Keep your head up. You're doing a great job running a great business while your husband is out serving our fantastic country. :)

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  2. hi Lindsay, don't let these not-so-nice comments get to you, I really like your honesty by the way :)

    and yes, we are flawed, but that makes God's mercy even more amazing!


    * I have got greasy hair right now too :(

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  3. my hair was so dirty today that i used half a bottle of baby powder to suck up the grease {and i had to go in to work!}
    for real though, thank you for this post! thank you for sharing your heart and reminding all of us that we are not perfect but that our identity lies with the risen Christ.
    amen & amen! love you girl!

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  4. Love this post. Love your honesty. Also, I rarely ever wash my hair :)

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  5. I love this post. It's so real. So honest. And I think sometimes in this world we have created VIA social media that we forget that we all have our flaws. That we are all human. We make mistakes.

    So what if we don't wash our hair everyday or we lose our to-do list. twice. We are still children of God. He accepts us, dirty hair and all. At the end of the day, it is not our jobs to judge others. None of us are perfect.

    So you rock on w your messy hair, awesome blog, and amazing artwork. And know that most of us are right there with ya. {Especially on that sitting on the couch instead of cleaning up dinner thing} Have a great day, girl. :)

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  6. i thought your hair was "grungy" because you were playing in the rain... which is probably a lot more fun than leaving mean comments:)

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  7. Count me into the sometimes wash my hair group. :) And that was a beautiful post. Thanks for sharing your heart.

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  8. I rarely comment, but I have been reading your blog for a couple months and immediately loved it so much that I went back and read tons of your older posts. This is by far my favorite post of yours, ever.

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  9. Love this post! You are right, n o one is perfect...we are all flawed, but yet we still have a God who loves us because we are made in His image. This is something I need to remind myself over & over again! Thanks for sharing your heart....keep on keeping it real :)

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  10. Wonderfully honest post... don't let anyone get you down!

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  11. Love the post!

    The hair thing made me laugh so much. I remember my deployment / greasy hair days. Lol

    I'm sure when you see Chris next week he won't even notice your grungy hair. ( but if you have time, go ahead and wash it, just in case Lol!)

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  12. Aw, people sure know how to be mean. All too often they look to make themselves feel better by cutting people down, I'll never understand.

    Just so you know, you don't have to prove anything to us. You're my sister in Christ and that's all that matters to me. We're sinners and I can rattle off my sins and flaws to you that far outweigh your messy room or disorganization, but it all doesn't matter.

    People of the world won't understand unfortunately. Keep your head up and keep clinging to Christ. :)

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  13. I can guarantee that the people hiding behind the name of anonymous are either jealous of how happy you appear on your blog, or unhappy with something going on in their life.

    People that can be that negative most likely have deeper issues with themselves then what they are tying in your comments section.

    I love that you are "you" - it really shows! :)

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  14. Aw girl. I'm right there with you on the hair thing. I'm off of work right now because of my chronic migraines. It's a long-term/short-term thing, but anyways. If people knew how long I went without showers/washing my hair, changing out of my comfy clothes, they'd be disgusted. LOL. My poor hubby. But you know what, people don't really know me and what's going on inside of me and my mind. But the Lord does. And that's all that matters. He loves you for who/what you are. That's something worth remembering on an ongoing basis. (Me too!)

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  15. As someone who was once publically attacked via blog drama I can tell you it is no fun. I cried for weeks at the attacks because I was an officer's wife. Honestly, I thought your hair was a mess because of the weather and never would have thought about washing!

    We took a trip to Hollywood and some of the pictures are gross of my hair because of the pollution! I couldn't believe how gross it was washing it the night I got home.

    I am so excited fr you not only for going to Moe's by yourself on your date, but also for owning the independance to do all of thse things on your own. I struggle with that, especially during deployment. I can't wait to hear about your amazing trip.

    Chin up- this too shall pass.

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  16. I ♥ u just the way you are! U b U and I'll b me! :) (((HUGS)))

    Don't change for anyone but the one above and don't worry what others say. Chin up!

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  17. Beautiful Lindsey! And so are you. I'm totally jealous of all you girls not having to wash your hair regularly. Me...I'm so oily, I'm an everyday-er. BUMMER. It's so much work.

    Sometimes, Lindsey, I have turned comments off on certain posts just so I can share my feelings without worrying about what anyone has to say....good or bad. Might work in the future. I know those anonymous attacks are hard to swallow. And, honestly I think they would be just as hard if they weren't anonymous.

    Love to you! ♥ april

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  18. Lindsay,

    Thank you for your honesty. It is a beautiful thing that you can share your faults, as most people would never want to make themselves look bad.

    God is so good! it's nice to be able to rest in his love, mercy and grace no matter who we are.

    Your blogs are great and you are refreshing! Be encouraged this week!

    Just think you will get to see your hubby soon. I bet you are excited!

    BTW I love your wave in the baby's room it looks awesome, now we just need the baby! Thank you for thinking of us this week.

    Love you and miss you.

    Amber

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  19. I stumbled across you recently and haven't commented much (because I'm a busy mama of 3 and well kind of a slacker in some areas- taking the time to leave comments on blogs being one of those areas), but I thought from the get- go that you were unbelievably adorable, crazy talented, sweet, and refreshingly honest! Ignore the nay-sayers! Amen, you are HIS and that is all that matters!! Something I've had to remind myself of a lot lately. Others opinions of me don't matter - God's does :)

    Also-- your hair looked cute! They were probably just jealous :D

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  20. Thank you for this honest and so very real post! Some people are just unbelievable that go out of their way to say hurtful, ridiculous things! Our God is good- all the time!! I'm so happy you are only stronger through all this!! :)

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  21. Lindsay,

    First, you are a beautiful, inspiring and admirable woman.

    Thank you for being so honest and sharing your feelings. It's such a shame that people need to say such unimportant and ridiculous comments to try and bring you down. But, you are strong and you won't let this tear you down!

    Thank you for encouraging me to be a stronger woman.

    Do what you do best...BE YOU! There is nothing wrong with flaws...no one's perfect (heck, I know that first hand). We all love you...greasy hair and all!!

    XOXO

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  22. Lindsay, I love following your blog. I've sometimes not taken photos of myself because I don't often wear make-up so if I don't have make up on, no photos. Or I'm in a t-shirt instead of cute clothes, or, I've put on too much weight, or my hair looks a mess. It's so encouraging that you are comfortable in your skin.

    Oh man, the messy house thing, I'm with ya. I'm trying to get better. I'm still so far from where I should be though with keep that house clean. :/ So thankful that God loves us despite those things! Please be encouraged in His Word today!

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  23. Don't let them get to you! I think you are fantastic - so keep your head up. :) I got some not so nice comments on Twitter about Handmade With Purpose (!), and I felt down about it for a while. But then I realized that I was doing a good thing, and that the people in my life that really matter to me were proud and appreciative. :) Thanks for sharing this!

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  24. Girl I LOVE this post! Love you!!! Don't feel bad for not responding and living at a computer screen. You have a lovely life, live it! I adore u!

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  25. Lindsay-
    First off, I love this blog and I appreciate the way you share your faith and love of Jesus freely and honestly. It is a great reminder to me too.
    Secondly - you are freakin adorable. I love your hair - washed or not.
    <3

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  26. I'm not gonna lie - when I saw the "messy" hair picture, I thought I was behind on a trend and immediately did the same to mine ;-)

    All joking aside (this coming from a long-time blog "stalker" who thinks you have a lovely soul), there are sad and lonely people out there who strike out at those who glow with happiness. In this age of instant gratification, digital communication and anonymity, people who would wish us hurt have a forum to express malice without fear of reprisal. Those people are small and petty. Those people are the ones we should send out the most love to.

    Think of the insults as a backhanded compliment - it often seems the more you glow and the happier you are, the more those who are unhappy would strike out at you. So, you must be doing something truly good if you're getting so many negative barbs trying to bring you down!

    And finally, my favorite passage from my mother: "The Lord shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.” – Psalms 121:7-8

    Keep on doing what you do!

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  27. what a well-written response to the "anonymous commenters" in our lives. thanks for reminding us that as imperfect & as flawed as we are, we're still His children. :) (and you are beautiful, lindsay -- hair washed or not!)

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  28. People who hide behind anonymous are cowards. I think that this is a very well written response and I am glad that you have decided not to let them bring you down for long. I don't know why people feel the need to go to great lengths to be cruel.

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  29. You go girl!! This is a beautifully written post!! We are all flawed, we all have imperfections, we are HUMAN!! Sometimes people associate our Christian label with perfection, but thats just it, if we were perfect, we wouldn't need Jesus!! Don't let the negative commenters out there get you down!! You are beautiful, your blog is great, & your artwork is fantastic!!

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  30. I hope you have a restful day! Nobody is perfect, that's what makes us all so great! Haters are just going to hate and if someone has nothing better to do than stalk your blogs and leave nasty comments on them, then I feel really bad for them.

    I think people sometimes forget bloggers are real people too and blogs are sometimes a filter. We let you see what we want you to see. No, you don't always see our piles of laundry, but we all know it happens :) Hugs Lindsay!

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  31. I appreciate your honesty! But I think you're adorable, even with the grungy hair. ;)

    I've been reading "Lies Women Believe" (by Nancy Leigh DeMoss), and the section right now is talking about just that - we so often let others determine our worth, but really, GOD is the one who makes us worthy. Such a good reminder for me, personally!

    {{hugs!}}

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  32. I'm a big fan of anyone willing to show their flaws. BIG, BIG fan. Because we all have them. It's fine and dandy to show off your best self, but I applaud you for being REAL for your readers. The ones who berate you for it are most likely the ones who are scared to death that someone will discover that they have flaws as well.

    *and...you are super adorable, even on your messy hair days*

    Megan
    LemonTreeLikes.wordpress.com

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  33. they're will always be anoynmous haters and there will always be a loving and graceful GOD!! Well written--you are doing a great job of shakin' them haters off! :)

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  34. This post definitly leaves me encouraged. Idk what is up with anonymous comments flying around the blog world. So rude. And childish. I am sorry you got those comments, but am happy to see how you turned it around into a positive and was reminded of what a beautiful person you are because God loves you, no matter what. <3

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  35. ps- I often choose to sleep in than get up to wash my hair. WHO CARES?! That's what they make dry shampoo spray for! ;)

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  36. Beautiful post Lindsay. Honestly anyone who would hide behind an anonymous name is a horrible coward. I hope they're reading this and realizing how horrible they were. We all love you. I love reading your blog and WE ALL HAVE FLAWS! Thank you for having the courage to show us yours.

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  37. Perfect.

    And, whoever anonymous is, must feel really bad about themselves to be so mean to you. For reals!

    Oh, and you're so not alone...I'm super forgetful, I have piles of stuff everywhere, and I don't wash my hair everyday. ;)

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  38. This is such a beautiful post Lindsay dear!! I think that you are a beautiful person and a kind hearted friend!! I love you no matter if your hair is dirty or your house is a little messy. Don't let others bring you down. xoxoxoxo

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  39. hey by the way i never wash my hair.
    well occasionally i do.

    and i admire your honesty and integrity and strength.

    rest today in LOVE. you, as all of us, deserve it.

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  40. this is why we love you - your honesty and heart shines through your blog with every post you write. this post is a great reminder and encouragement to all of us, linds. thanks for saying what you said on here! thanks for having messy hair. and thanks for being a Sasquatch like me. <3

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  41. you mean you're a real person?! some people are so nasty. great post- it's nice to see real people!

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  42. I shower two, maybe three times a week. People that criticize your appearance are just jealous. You are obviously having more fun than them just being alive and many people can't handle that.

    I live on a 35' sailboat, work for peanuts, I'm broke, buy new clothes like twice a year, and shower...sometimes. But I guarantee that I am happier with my life than a lot of people with money, cars, clothes, jewelry, and showers.

    Remember, life is messy, embrace what you have and who you are. Forget about people who are hurtful. They aren't worth the effort.

    “Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‘Wow! What a Ride!’”

    -Hunter S. Thompson

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  43. Hi there! I am not normally a person to comment but I couldn't help myself....
    First, I didn't even notice your hair in that pic....the very yummy looking smoothy with your cute outfit and the awesome color of the wall behind you was what caught my eye.
    I'm flawed too, our bedroom looks the same and in addition, since we don't have kids yet our 2 extra bedrooms (which probably should be used as guest rooms) are now turned into dressing, storage, place to put stuff rooms. I would much rather sit on the couch with wine instead of helping with dishes.
    Keep your chin up, you are loved and you are great just the way you are.

    Renae
    Minnesota

    PS. love the blog:)

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  44. I've seen a lot of people posting about receiving rude comments lately or about blog bullying. I know it's not new by any means but it seems like its happening far too often lately. I saw this post today.... http://emjayandme.blogspot.com/2010/07/kind-hearted-blogger-campaign.html ...
    about a Kind Hearted Blogger Campaign. I think it's a wonderful idea & plan on pledging.

    PS...I think you looked super cute in that photo...messy hair or not. I'd go shoe shopping with you any day with that hair!

    Keep on rocking & staying true to yourself!

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  45. I just love this :) We all have our flaws and to lay them out there like that really takes courage. By the way...I have greasy hair too.

    But to remember, and remind others, that you are loved unconditionally by your Heavenly Father despite anything that might not be perfect is such a wonderful reminder. It was so nice for me to be reminded of this today too!

    So thank you :)

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  46. i'm so not a fan of negative people. but unfortunately we have to deal with them sometimes.

    a little secret? i wash my hair twice a week. some days? it looks down-right awful. and i still go into work with it looking like that. it's just hair! (and for the record, your hair is fabulous.)

    my husband shared that bible verse just yesterday on his facebook page. methinks that someone is trying to speak to me lately too...

    best wishes.

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  47. Thanks for writing this, Lindsay. I can definitely relate. We all have a lot of flaws, and I think if we each focus a little more on ourselves instead of other people (ahem, anonymous mean commenters), life would be a whole lot easier. Also, I'm sooooo bad at responding to comments lately. I feel bad, but it just happens sometimes - lots to do!

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  48. When I read your post today, I started bawling my eyes out because I too have been crudely judged lately. Not people posting ugly comments on my blog, but feeling the affects of what Military Wife FRG Leaders can do to a person's self-esteem. I've never been in a place where I felt like I wasn't good enough to be part of a circle of people. I've only been at our new base for 3 months and I already feel judged/rejected and I haven't even had the chance to get to show what I'm all about. Your post spoke volumes to my heart, especially your Bible verse. Thank you for reminding me that, Yes! I'm flawed but I still have God in my circle of "people" to count on. Thank You!

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  49. I will never ever understand why people take time to leave mean, hurtful comments. It boggles my mind. You are beautiful inside and out. I love your honesty!

    XO,
    Heather

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  50. Isn't Jesus the best encourager ever?! Thanks for the awesome reminder to keep in all in perspective :)

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  51. duuuude, they were just jealous cuz you were rocking such an ah-some headband. ;)

    girl, i absolutely LOVED this post. love your heart. love your desire to know our Savior even more. love YOU!

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  52. Are you kidding me Lindsay?! You are like the cutest thing ever. They are envious of your beauty, that's all. You are liked by so many. Keep on rocking it girly!

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  53. I'm a fairly new follower and I'm so inspired by you, your stories, your journey, and you! You are beautiful and although words hurt sometimes take refuge in the ones that are close to you and truly lift you up!

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  54. All Im gonna say is Amen sister...ok, maybe not, i have more to say:) he he

    I have been there, I am too imperfect, and quite forgetful. I am proud to be your friend:)

    Oh, and p.s. you should have seen my hair last weekend. All weekend long in a headband and greasy as all get out...and i loved it!

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  55. hi! this is me coming out of the shadows of blog following to comment for the first time :) i mostly blog about books, but i love creativity & fun so naturally i love your blog! to be quite honest, i scrolled thru the post with your supposed grungy look... & did not notice anything of the sort! i always think you look precious.

    we all have flaws but are thankfully made whole by a loving God! amen :) great post.

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  56. I am sorry that the negative anonymous people are bringing you down. Please don't let them. You rise above it and keep on moving forward.

    Hugs..another Becca

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  57. I love your attitude about it and your awareness of what really matters in life. Hello G-O-D. :) You are so beautiful inside and out - don't let a crumby post like that get you down. Enjoy the positives of the people that support you here and let all others roll off your shoulders.

    Your blog is wonderful because you are a wonderful person and it is part of a reflection of you. Thank you for sharing all that you do.

    Love and hugs.

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  58. Linds,
    So glad you took the opportunity to allow God to speak encouragement into your life. Don't listen to ignorant anonymous commentators. You are loved by God AND many others. He has given you such an amazing talent. I LOVE and MISS you! -Lindsay Anderson

    P.S. Your hair looked cute in that pic (I assumed it was scrunched). Also, I count the ocean as a shower sometimes. Living by the beach rocks :)

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  59. From one mediterranean gal to another,
    This post was great. And i love that you mentioned facial hair. It comes with the olive skin and I'm glad I'm not the only one that has to deal with it :)

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  60. Your blog was such a blessing to me today!! I worry and fret sometimes over the way things in my life aren't kept as "perfect" as I would like, but I keep thinking of a sermon I heard a few weeks ago about having "unshakable joy". As long as our hope and joy is ultimately found in God we can have that - no matter how messy our home office might be! Every day I strive to be more organized, but above all, LIFE IS GOOD and we're here to love God and love this life He's given us!

    Rock on! :)

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  61. Sounds like we are very similar! I am sitting here looking at our house as I right this thinking, 'poor Cody married a slob!'

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  62. I'm so proud of you Linds! Great post!

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  63. Your a sweet girl, who writes a REAL blog about her life. It's a blog for golly sakes you should be allowed to post pictures with no makeup, a messy room or crazy hair and not be ridiculed by it. You have no reason to apologize, the person or people who commented in such a negative passion need to get over themselves. We are all human and no one is perfect. gosh!

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  64. any jerk who hands out insults under the cover of anonymity isn't worth even the few moments it will take to read the comment. Delete it and move on--you're a good person with a great blog, and judging by the amount of comments saying the same thing, other people know it too. :-)

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  65. holla, keep on keeping on. he sees your heart, delights in it and is so very proud of his daughter.

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  66. Well said Lindsay!! You are always an inspiration, and you're all around a FABULOUS person!!

    Thanks for being you and for brightening my day everyday with your awesome blog! :) Keep up your great work, and have a wonderful day!!

    xoxo,
    Katherine

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  67. Lindsay,

    I just found you through the Pleated Poppy link-up. While your art, cute haircut, and pics of Hawaii make me like you and want to read more... this post makes me LOVE you. :) What a well said, scriptural message for all of us! Thank you!

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  68. Encouraged indeed. You are beautiful. Your words were just what I needed to hear today. Thank you! Oh and my hair often looks the same. ;)

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